are we staggering or running? it’s not post culture shock anymore. i’m running out of scapegoats for my predicaments. theyre lurking around here somewhere.
been back nearly 3 months and i’m still job hunting. i have made progress though. met up with MTV a few weeks back for a design/management position. ‘we all love you but we can’t expand right now’. i have my second of three interviews for a hi end design firm in LA. so that’s a good thing. an even better thing is that my brothers and I are doing business together…starting a social networking site in a specific niche market. for the three of you that read this, you know what it’s about. the others: it’s top secret and i will kill you.
BUT what takes the danish is hands down was my interview with a ‘team coordinator’ for acn wireless…a ponzi pyramid scheme where new recruits are encouraged to sell wireless services and basically recruit more of their friends to enroll – at $499 each. it was complete bullshit. but he had great tricks up his sleeve…a promotional video featuring donald trump, legal protection, failing to mention the start-up fee, promising a rich lavish lifestyle. when press though, he did elicit a few honest, shocking answers…the fact that after a year he has only 60 customers for service, but 320 lowest level recruits. ACN. total fucking scam. afterwards i talked to the barista at coffee bean. jack hails from Missouri, lived in rural country with 1 mile between each house. now that i think about it, that really sucks if you’re a kid without a bike.
having terrible, terrible luck with the opposite sex lately. nothing really more to add, but that, yeah, i’m not really in uh, relationship get-to-know-you at the moment. i saw an old friend at big 5 the other day. he was buying black shoes for the holiday, asking me about my woman situation. funny thing about us jews. i guess i’m at that stage when the topic of marriage is making a more frequent appearance. that dick. anyways. it’s weird.
it’s like annoying as all hell conversation when you meet someone from your university or home town; the blabber rants on incessantly, spewing out a 6 inch thick catalog of names who either don’t recognize or want to forget. “oh do you know this guy, he lived on your street, played a lot of basketball…steve something? No? he’s a really funny guy. alcoholic too. what about…”
yeah what about NO.
anyways…this guy asks me my age (24) then somehow jumps to ‘yeah you know, when you’re 30 though, your options and choices are more limited. all the 22, 23 year olds are taken. then you start asking, well, she’s 27…why is she still single? you gotta ask yourself that.’ so now i’m 30, still single, jobless, and probably going to end up with someone who is likely unattractive and so ill tempered no one wants to be with her.
this guy is my new best friend.
last friday night we went out for chinese food. it was terrible, but the fortune cookie i got was great. it went something along the lines of ‘you’re only just starting on the path to many great things.’ it was something like that, but more, what, chinese-ee? fortune cookie-ish speak? okay. i’m a racist. but screw you. it was my cookie!
with the fortune of an overprocessed malodextrine, cardboard like pastry, i wake up anew! job interview is on monday.
p.s. i emailed the dude from ACN…i’ll update tomorrow with his response…if he writes back…please, please write back. this could get very, very fun.